That Night I Slept in My Office

I arrived home this evening, after picking up the toddler from day care, to find my husband curled up on our bed, mostly asleep. He informed me that he wasn’t feeling well.

Not a big deal — I ordered Panera for dinner for the kids, which they ate happily. I went back upstairs to let my husband know that there was a sandwich in the fridge for him for later only to find him sprawled over the bed, in an even deeper sleep.

“Do you want me to sleep downstairs in my office?” I asked tentatively. He didn’t respond. I asked again, more loudly this time. “Oh. Yeah,” he replied, “Sorry — I thought I had responded, but it must have been only in my head. I don’t want to move, so if you could sleep in your office that would be great.”

Shoot. That wasn’t the response I was looking for. However, in the interest of letting him get a good night’s sleep, I was willing to give it a try.

But I VERY particular about how I sleep.

My office was added this past summer with a home addition and it has a daybed. I thought that this would be a great place to take naps — as I am a great lover of naps — but I found that it could not be done. I needed ALL OF THE THINGS of my bed, even for a nap. It has become a real problem when we travel and I cannot create something remotely close to the way I usually sleep.

So upon agreeing to sleep in my office tonight, I immediately had to start moving my stuff down into my office. And, in trying to be thoughtful, was doing this in the dark so as not to wake my husband.

In the first haul, I grabbed my book, my iPad, my eye mask, my stainless steel water bottle with a straw, my face mask, and my MidNite sleeping pills that I sometimes take when I wake up during the night (you never know).

Upon surveying the daybed in my office, I went back upstairs for my own pillow, my full body pillow, and my weighted blanket. EVEN THOUGH the daybed has a weighted blanket, it wasn’t MY weighted blanket.

I also grabbed my eye cream and my lip balm — because I couldn’t fathom how I would go to sleep without my eyes and lips feeling like they normally do.

I tucked in the toddler. She spent an inordinate amount of time picking out her pajamas. Her favorite pair was in the laundry. Did she want monkey pajamas? No. Owls? No. Cupcakes? No. I finally wrestled her into a shirt, but she refused to put on pants. “NO. I NOT!” she yelled at me.

Sigh. I hear you, girlfriend. I like to have everything exactly the way I want it when I sleep too. But, you are a toddler, and I’m not arguing with you over pants. I told her that she could go pantless and that I was leaving. At that point she changed her mind. Owls it was.

She always listens to the same playlist on her Echo Dot (“Relax, Baby”). As I was leaving her room, she said “Alexa! Off” reminding me that I needed to say “Alexa, turn off in 30 minutes” so that the music would cease. At this point, I was laughing inside how much she loves her bedtime routine to be exactly the same, as much as I cherish my own.

Forgot my iPad charger, so I had to make yet another trip upstairs. This time my husband noticed the entire production that this had turned into. He began to suggest that I could stay in the master bedroom, and that he would instead move into his office to continue sleeping. “NOPE,” I told him, “I have ALREADY MOVED ALL OF MY STUFF.”

Back downstairs, I made myself a cup of tea. In my office I fiddled with the temperature. Closed the curtains. Arranged the pillow, body pillow, and weighted blanket on my bed. Filled up my water bottle and placed it within reach of the daybed. Eye cream and lip balm applied. Then I have to read my book with the eye mask around my neck. I don’t know why — it just has to be that way. I try to read 10% of my book each night (currently “Less” by Andrew Sean Greer).

Then I watch an episode of something on Netflix (currently Schitt’s Creek) until I am too tired to pay attention anymore, at which point I pull the eye mask up over my face. Oh THAT’s why I keep it around my neck — for easy reach when I need it.

I have all of my things, trying to create an environment as close to my normal sleeping habit as possible.

But I’m nearly positive I won’t sleep well tonight.

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